In communities across the U.S.A.
Folks celebrate Christmas in various ways.
But a stranger tradition was never conveyed
Than the Lighted Farm Implement Parade.
It's festive, it's clever, it's merry, it's bright,
It's a rural event on a cold winter's night.
When citizens gather, hot toddies are made
For the Lighted Farm Implement Parade.
If you've never seen one, I pity you so.
They light up their tractors and someone says, "go!"
Can you imagine? It's just as portrayed:
A Lighted Farm Implement Parade.
Farmers and merchants take long strings of lights
And fasten them everywhere, taping them tight,
To balers and swathers and harvester blades
For these Lighted Farm Implement Parades.
On Thresher! On Combine! On Tractor! On Cart!
We're freezing our tushies awaiting the start
Of the festival our friends absolutely say they'd
Never miss: the Farm Implement Parade.
On Baler! On Flatbed! On Harvester, too!
Milk trucks and tankers and things that go "Moo!"
We perch on the curb in the spot we surveyed
It's gotten so popular, everyone comes.
The firemen, mayor, the band with its drums...
It's not just for farmers, so much is displayed
In the Lighted Farm Implement Parade.
The merchants are out, presenting their wares,
With lighted delivery trucks, each one declares,
"We're part of this farm town! We're happy we've stayed
For the Lighted Farm Implement Parade!"
Why do they do it? It takes lots of tape
To turn a tractor into a holiday-scape.
But farming towns say they never would trade
Their Lighted Farm Implement Parade.
So bring on the sheep, the cows, and the goats,
The horse-drawn antiques and the harvest queen floats,
My Thermos is full of the cocoa I've made
Sally O'Neal lives and writes in the largely rural eastern side of Washington State, where she enjoys lighted farm implement parades in towns from Yakima to Sunnyside and beyond. She writes weekly for sportsmansguide.com.